And She Decided to Love Herself...
I met Kelsey Onkka, intuitive & forgiveness life coach, energy worker, and destiny card reader, several years ago. She’s the daughter of one of my fav people, Leni Onkka. I love this family so much. They are a group of gifted women who have been a touchstone in my life and have paved the way for my continuing education in all things spiritual. And they are horse people!
I wanted to introduce all of you to Kelsey because I had heard recently about an amazing wellness transformation she experienced during Covid and was astounded by what she learned in the process. She’s a truly authentic person and of course, a horse lover!
Q: So Kelsey, please tell us a little about yourself…
A: I’m 28 years old and I work as an intuitive (I met someone via a manifestation at the age of 15…this experience showed me what I was capable of).
Up until a little while ago, I’ve always been overweight. I love my work, but I knew that there was always something in the way…something holding me back from being me. And now, reflecting back, I can’t believe that I’ve lost somewhere between 75-100 lbs. I haven’t been my current weight since I was 16 yrs old. It feels good. Now when I take pictures of myself, I love the person in the photos. It wasn’t always like that for me.
Q: How and why did you begin your transformation?
A: It really started with engaging in intense therapy and brain restructuring. The restructuring included dealing with karmic patterns and setting new intentions. One of our biggest fears is what we’re meant to be. My goal was to find myself and I literally went through a rebirth.
I figured out that I had to work with my inner child to heal the root cause of my trauma working through triggers and trauma points. I put in the time and dug deep. I went through the five stages of grief and my focus of this drama ultimately turned out to be my relationship with food. I actually went for a few months where I was angry with food.
I had to deconstruct myself. I discovered that I needed to get rid of the control that food had over me. My coping skills had the same patterns and I used marijuana as one my habits.
I clearly was wired for capitalism and didn’t take care of myself. Always moving, never sitting still. Through the process I learned that I’m a home body. I had to learn to trust my intuition. I was also burnt out and discovered the use of key herbs to help with ADHD and anxiety, including amino acids L- Tyrosine, L- Theanine, and adaptogen herbs Rhodiola and ashwagandha root.
It literally took me two to three years to walk through this complex process. I had to learn about what was holding me back from feeling my best. I literally felt that I didn’t deserve food in my life. As though I was somehow unworthy, and I wasn’t deserving of things I wanted in my life.
Q: What habits did you utilize to make the change?
A: I absolutely love the Oak app for meditation! I started simply with their boxed breathing training myself so I could begin the process of meditation. It’s been a game changer! It’s truly helped me turn off the fight or flight response. I focused on manifesting a calm, cool and collected demeanor.
As part of my brain restructuring, I journaled and continue to journal about my relationship with food. My trigger foods were pizza and cheeseburgers. I was literally addicted to these foods…something that happened in my childhood. And I would hide my food habits from my family. [Brain restructuring is clearing your energetic body of karmic patterns that are set in your brain since you were born. I go through and clear every pattern, habit, and program that is there to make you not want to live your destiny and I clear it to the root cause and change the intention, so you can wake up to a new lessons and new things to work through. Instead of the same everyday karmic patterns and habits.]
I also love dry brushing. It’s great for moving your lymph around and moving out the body’s toxins. As the weight started dropping off, I gained more confidence and felt more connected to my body. I started doing yoga.
I also put myself first now. I started this process with practicing self-care once a week and now, every day is a self-care day.
I love to draw. Through the transformation, I learned that I love to express myself through this art form. I love being in nature and near the forest. I draw a lot of trees. I feel more artistic now. I would consider myself a cool, artistic person who loves to be around horses.
As I mentioned, I’m a homebody. I have a new appreciation and gratitude for all that I have.
I discovered that you can’t be in a state of gratitude when you are feeling victimized. We are so obsessed with our habits and coping mechanisms. I say let them go and live in your dream life.
Q: What role have horses played in your life?
A: I love just spending time with them. I enjoy caring for them, massaging, using the equi-pulse and lasers. I’m just an animal person. I love spending time with my dogs too.
Q: What is your current relationship with food?
A: I’ve always been a picky eater. It’s a process. I learned to slowly reintroduce foods that we all perceive as ‘bad.’ Now I’m an intuitive eater. I discovered there’s no bad in food, there’s only what you want. I now eat everything in moderation.
I eat intuitively now so every day I wake up I allow myself to have whatever I want. It could be scrambled eggs, a cheeseburger, toast, etc. but I allow myself to enjoy the food. No fat shaming in my brain. No self-criticism, no telling myself this has no nutritional value when everything does. No more negative self-talk when I eat anything, just joy and gratitude and I’m able to have the food and be alive! I think we all focus so much on how to treat food when we should be thankful for the food. After becoming more kind to myself I allowed myself to open up and try new foods slowly at my own pace because It gives me time to figure out if I life something or not with no negative emotions.
I am not a routine person so every day is different but I am make sure I have breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I threw away the scale because that doesn’t matter to me anymore. I meditate every morning to set the tone of the day and I allow myself to be free.
Q: Any other discoveries through this transformation process you’d like to share?
A: We’re not here to fix others and get involved in co-dependent relationships. I’ve now created good boundaries with people and I’ve learned the art of saying ‘no.’ I had to go through a re-evaluation of my mental, emotional, physical and spiritual being to get to where I am now.
I now know that being fully alone is a good thing. It’s given me the space and freedom to feel myself and now that I know who I am, I’m able to fall in love with myself. Prior to this work, I was just coping…getting through. Now I’m fully me. Believe me, I went through a lot of crying, depression and anxiety. I didn’t believe I could do the work I do now as an intuitive. Now I feel like anything is possible.
Kelsey is a destiny card reader who uses ancient knowledge to help you understand your destiny and what you are here to do. She is trained in past life clearing, energy work, and intuitive life coaching. She is here to help you create the reality you want! Follow Kelsey Onkka on Instagram @DestinyClearingwithKelsey. You can also find Kelsey on her website at www.destinyclearingwithkelsey.com